Mission Mission

This bold flyer, spotted at local fave the Attic, proudly proclaims having the longest happy hour in the city.  Of course, this is a hotly debated topic, as several other bars around the city also make a similar boast.  For instance, the Elbo Room also claims that their happy hour, from 5-9pm everyday, is the longest in the city.

Depending on how we want to look at this, both sides are technically correct.  The Elbo Room offers a more versatile longest happy hour, whereas the Attic’s weekend and Monday specials can not be denied.  Me?  I’d be happy just to know the longest and cheapest happy hours in the Mission.  Where do you go to forget the pain of your job (or just whenever the bar has drinks that you can actually afford)?

Previously:

NIMBY says NO MORE DJs at the Attic

Oh, the Phonebooth… that tantalizing first experience of the freedom of San Francisco culture, where the lights are reddish and the air is hazish. At the Phonebooth, everyone has mastered the art of smelling, breathing, and looking the other way while listening to the dubious jukebox selections of a diverse (in quality of music) crowd. I haven’t been there since my very first days in the Mission, although I lived a block away for the first 6 months, but some new friends are going through their self-characterized Phonebooth phase so we stepped inside yesterday at a happy hour sort of time. The very first fellow to greet tente gonflable me was a massive, beautiful coon hound with blue eyes. He was completely charming and sleek.

Being there so early, I got $.50 off my beer and the opportunity to admire the unique decor which includes: barbie doll chandelier, unidentified suspended skull, robot and Trogdor tattoos, and a pool table at the back. I was interested to learn that the inside-out smoking policy doesn’t go into effect until after dark, and I finally got to play some pool: two games and I won them both, which is how I know I was dreaming.

Link to more Mission Mission dive bar coverage.

Photo by pugetive

Bender’s after their fire. (Don’t worry, they’ve remodeled and reopened.) Originally Uploaded by mission75

Bender’s Bar is a bar in the Mission that is normally overlooked because of its “far away” location at 19th and S Van Ness (it’s around the corner from Beauty Bar). This is the perfect place for curing those Happy Hour Blues. Happy Hour Blues are when you and your coworkers go for a drink at a bar you would never set foot in if you weren’t going to happy hour with your coworkers. It’s hard to all go out for drinks at these places because: 1) either you’re a dive-bar drinker (Bud, Fat Tire, Jack Daniels), or you’re a beer nerd (Death & Taxes, Celebration, Old Portrero) and most happy hour places only cater to one or the other; 2) Happy Hour Bars also are usually cramped in the first place, but 3) then you add 4-8 people in your crowd trying to talk over and to one another, crawling over people to get drinks, and you ultimately end up sitting cramped in the corner talking to only one person instead of a few — and isn’t Happy Hour a team-building experience?

Bender’s is nothing like a Happy Hour Bar, but it would be perfect for Happy Hour crowds. For starters, it’s HUGE. There’re lots and lots of booths, tables and long booth seating. There’s a great selection of divey and beer nerd drinks (Johnny, the owner and bartender is a long-standing and respected employee at the world-famous Toronado). There’s also good cheap bar food! I hate when you wake up after a happy-hour drink-turned-binge-drinking night with rot gut.

I propose that Happy Hour crowds travel just a little to a great bar instead of the closest, mediocre financial district/SOMA blah. Bender’s is only three blocks from BART, and if someone doesn’t want to walk those three blocks, you probably shouldn’t be drinking with them.