Mission Mission

Recently, six porta potties appeared at the entrance to Dolores Park, more than doubling the number of restroom options previously available.  The effect has been tremendous, with bathroom lines reduced dramatically, even during yesterday’s Hunky Jesus extravaganza.  And now dedicated boyfriends no longer have to prove their affection by waiting with their significant others in the girls line!

So, has the city finally figured it out? Are these now a semi-permanent fixture in the park until the long awaited Dolores renovation project constructs completely new ones?

If not, then they’re totally blowing it.  For now, enjoy the convenience and the cleanliness! Seriously, these are some of the cleanest porta potties in which I’ve ever set foot! And they smell nice too! Kind of like flowers! So much so that I exclaimed as much upon entering, and the woman using the one next to me agreed, “Isn’t it delightful?”

It sure is. Enjoy it while it lasts!

The answer is: both! See you at the park this weekend!

Well, it must have been, because they seemed to think they would have better luck on the girls’ side. Which, mind you, was already extraordinarily long, historically long, so long in fact that it began to encroach on our birthday picnic.

I’ve seen girls in the boys’ bathroom line before, cunning individuals who harness their multi-faceted powers of persuasion in order to be admitted into the quicker line, but I’ve never seen it the other way around.

Hmmm, perhaps they’re just being good boyfriends, sticking it out with their girls so the unfortunate females don’t have to endure the wait all alone.  Awww, now it’s kind of cute.  Sort of.  Cuter than the Dolores Park Peeper at least.

Regardless, I think we can all agree that the wait for the girls’ bathroom in Dolores Park is ridiculous. What ever happened to all those porta-potties?

Ladies, you tell us:  What’s the longest you’ve ever waited for the bathroom at Dolores Park?

This dude was so busy freaking out all the children with his fancy stilt-work, he had to leash his attack puppy to a fire hydrant to guard the Airstream (and prevent unnecessary hipster maulings).  Yes, it’s being towed by an Acura SUV with a kayak.

Let’s see, I’m just going to categorize this one as “Life in the Mission” and call it a day.

Previously:

Global Warming is Real

We witnessed most of the most pleasant DJ-police interactions we’ve ever seen in Dolores Park over the weekend.  Look at those wide smiles on the faces of everyone involved!  The whole scene lasted less than a minute, with the officer walking up and having a word followed by the DJs immediately complying.

Everyone must have been pretty techno’d out because catcalls of “Fuck the Police” were muted and sparse.  Or maybe it was just because the sun was going down (albeit epically).

Two conclusions from today’s 77-degree day:

• Climate change is real
• Most of you don’t care about football

[photo by potential past]

If I was better at Photoshop, I’d throw a 1950′s postcard style “Greetings from… the Mission” over this baby, but you’re just going to have to use your imagination.

A little background on this lovely photo from Chris Garcia:

Sheng Wang took this photo of local comedians at Dolores Park last summer.
Pictured Left to Right: Donny Divanian, Alex Koll, Kevin Munroe, Chris Garcia, Emily Heller.

If you don’t remember Chris, you probably ought to see his hilarious stand-up bit on the Mission we posted a while ago.

What better way is there to you show that you’re down with hyper-local clichés than sporting this handsome T-shirt?

It’s available tomorrow at True SF on Haight.

[via DJ Josh B.]

As Apple hasn’t yet dropped $7.5 million, it looks like the current owners of Dolores Park Castle are looking for alternative sources of revenue:

No, sadly not an Arcade Fire show.  Uptown Almanac’s KevMo reports:

I overheard someone mention that there was an upscale open bar at Dolores Park Church.  So I took one look at my tshirt with kittens printed on it and jeans covered in mud, figured that was good enough and rolled.  Now, I’m not really sure what was going on last night, but there were a lot of people wearing suits, cocktail dresses, some bongos, and lots of free Don Julio.

Hey,  if 7500 Googlers got together, they could pool their bonuses and take this place off the market (at a roomy 2 square feet per person).

Why no Apple love in the Mission? You’d think this is something even Chicken John could get behind.

The only question is where? On Mission? Or Valencia? A few proposals:

The Social Security Building / old Hibernia Bank on Valencia and 22nd and Valencia:

Pros: Apple-eqsue architecture
Cons: even longer Boogaloo lines

Dolores Park Castle:

Pros: empty building finally used; good WiFi coverage for the park; nice park to rest in while awaiting Genius Bar appointments
Cons: dark wood beams may conflict with Steve Jobs beech aethsetic; Pottery Barn may attempt to move into Christian Science Church next door

Dolores Park Bathrooms:

Pros: Even better WiFi coverage in DP; safe refuge for Blue Bottle; clean bathrooms
Cons: white Apple logo easily tagged

Please add your suggestions in the comments.

(top photo by Chris Carlsson; Apple logo via Wikipedia)