Mission Mission

This gal Amanda knows:

I was looking forward to a real summer afternoon of day drinking, sunbathing, and perhaps a hot dog or three. I wore a yellow dress and brought some weed and a bottle of bourbon. When I arrived I was greeted by a random dude who guided me to a palm and bougainvillea-soaked backyard.

There were so many grown-ups and screaming toddlers. Despite the fact that I’m no longer a teenager and have bills, I don’t consider myself a grown-up. The difference is slight to the naked eye, and is definitely more philosophical, but it’s there.

There is a tone of voice in grown-ups. Much like that Hollywood accent in old movies, grown-ups talk about stupid things in a stupid tone. They also have small children, whom they dislike greatly, and speak to as if they were programming a robot.

I struck up a conversation with an elderly man who was manning the grill. We talked about The War. I slipped away to refill my drink and almost tripped over a tiny little boy named Oliver.

I dropped to my knees in order to see his eyes. “Hi Oliver”.

He looked at me and took my hand. Oliver led me to the punch bowl labeled Adult Lemonaide. His sticky hand lifted the ladle and he moved it around slowly in the punch, enjoying the sloshing sound.

Read on for Oliver’s mom’s reaction and the life-affirming conclusion to the whole episode.

[Map by Google Maps]

The mural:

The video:

Whether they’re related or not, they’re both compelling works of art. Watch the whole video here:

(Thanks to Jenny Gottstein for the tip!)

UPDATE: Got a relevant email:

thrilled you posted about me and my shark fin. kool kid is SF based (his mgr is the head booker for Yoshi’s) so i would guess he’s related to that mural somehow. not often you see rap artists taking up environmental causes.

we are a social media agency that works for the ocean (not kidding, it’s our client) and we’ve been promoting that video the last few days.

Do you know about this shark art tour that’s swinging through SF next weekend? thats what his video was promoting. http://thegreatwestcoastmigration.blogspot.com/p/migration.html

also, we put his lyrics up on rapgenius.com and asked shark scientists to put in their interpretations: http://rapgenius.com/Kool-kid-kreyola-me-and-my-shark-fin-lyrics

Rachel Dearborn
Upwell
project twitter: @upwell_us

There’s a new drink coming soon to the bar menu at Mission Bowling Club, and they were previewing it last night. It’s called the “Honey Bee” and it contains Tito’s Vodka and a number of fruit and flower essences and some other stuff. It tastes of honey but somehow it’s not too sweet. Perfect for a summer evening on the patio (or on the lanes). Be on the lookout.

As I pointed out in 2010, the giant posable wooden artist’s torso lunging out of the front of Flax Art & Design seems to be perpetually trying to take down the motel next door with a variety of art supplies.

Well, now the somewhat gender neutral figure has been dressed for battle.

Maybe people are more into drawing super heroes now that they’ve taken over the multiplexes. Or maybe it was just time.

Insult to injury! Dang. New mural off 24th.

[via Talent Is An Asset]

Last Saturday, a car crashed into the bike rack area in front of Zeitgeist, destroying a bunch of bikes and breaking some poor guy’s leg. Uptown Almanac has the scoop and some more bike snuff pictures.

In case you bailed early, dragging your useless pile of spokes and gears home while sobbing uncontrollably, you’re entitled to an insurance claim from the car’s owner. That’s right, bikes are vehicles too, and are covered under standard collision policies. The SF Bike Coalition informs us:

If your bicycle was one of the bikes damaged in the crash, go to the Mission Police Station and provide a description of your bike. You will receive a case number and details to file an insurance claim.

[photo via Uptown Almanac]

I mean like just wow, right?

[HYPNOSF via Burrito Justice]

So this means that I can finally *actually* use the marvelous bike lines that were striped over a year ago!  Although they were a much-needed addition to a very hectic section of the street, the problem used to be that the concrete over which the bicycle lanes were painted was jacked up so badly that riding within would at worse cause one to wipe out or at best come away with a serious butt-massage.

Now we are treated to the smooth buttery bliss of fresh pavement and I don’t have get in the way of cars anymore!  Everyone wins!

Previously:

• Treacherous 17th Street Potrero crossing gets bike lanes!

Armed with a paint scraper, this guy came blustering down 17th clearing our city’s telephone poles of xeroxed flyers and other like debris. Unfortunately, his cleanliness≈godliness approach did not extend to the sidewalks, where he discarded newly created trash as he continued on his rampage. I tailed him until Guerrero (well, I was on my way home) where he ducked through a doorway to pick up his dry cleaning.