Mission Mission

Wow, cyclist heroism is the theme of the week! You may remember a post from a couple of weeks ago about Jesse’s beloved green cruiser being stolen from his garage. Well, MM reader Emily posted a comment that she had a similar bike gathering dust in her yard:

hey, i’ve got a not-as-cool, but similar black schwinn cruiser in my backyard (that somehow hasn’t been stolen) looking for some love if you want a replacement. i’ve been meaning to fix it up, but would rather give it to someone who needs it!

Yesterday Jesse reported:

Just wanted to let you know that I hooked up with Emily today and grabbed her old cruiser.  She didn’t want anything for it, but I brought her a nice bottle of Amador Cellars Zinfandel I picked up when I went wine tasting there over Thanksgiving.  A very cheap price to pay for a replacement cruiser. Thanks for posting for me, and thanks to good hearted people.  I’ve attached a pic of the new bike.

Now that’s what I call an awesome neighbor. You rock, Emily!

(Say, you wouldn’t happen to have any French-threaded 58cm road forks in your yard, would you? )

The latest entry in Mission Mission’s Introduce Yourself section comes from Jason and concludes:

Oh, and if your new to the neighborhood and you drive an SUV I have stopped popping your tires and keying your paint job long ago. In fact, welcome.

Link. Kudos, Jason!

Reader Anna K. witnessed some bikes getting jacked this morning, and served the thieves a heaping bowl of JUSTICE:

I was walking to get some coffee at Rogers this morning and saw two bums acting suspicious around a pair of bikes locked up in front of Jocelyn’s bakery at 20th & Lex.

On my way back I saw the bums running off with the bikes. Called the cops, they picked up the two douche-faces and the bikes are now safe with SFPD.

Thought I’d let you know, in case the owners email you in hopes of finding their wheels.

I only saw the bikes from afar, but here is what I gathered with my limited eyesight.

• Two (possibly dude’s) road bikes
• 20 inch frames
• one maroon
• one black

To reclaim the bikes, they should call the SFPD non-emergency number at 415 252 1426.

Some might call Anna a hero! Not me though, I’m more into RAZOR scooters.

An offer too good to be true?

We’ve got individual rooms for rent!—think college dorm-style, a long hallway down the middle with rooms on either side, shared bathrooms, shared toilets. Below, Zeitgeist is a vibrant bar with a sunny beer garden for SF summers. We’re looking for a few good additions to our tenant base who can appreciate the bustly setting below while also respecting the solitude of their fellow hotel mates above the bar. Two rooms are available this month, two more next, each approximately 10′ x 10′. Electrical, water, and free Internet access are all included. We require a $600 security deposit, a $50 key deposit, and first month’s rent at lease signing. Here’s another cool thing: drugs are absolutely not tolerated, but well-behaved pets are. We’re dog and cat friendly. Background checks and credit checks will be run on all applicants, if only because the harmony of our living space is important to us. Interested? Please come by the bar and fill out an application or, better yet, make an appointment by contacting out resident property manager at: timeghost11@gmail.com.

I love the part about how “drugs are absolutely not tolerated.”  I’ll remember that the next time a coked-out bartender yells at me for only ordering two bloody marys.  On the other hand, you’ll be in perfect position to observe what I call the “Zeitgeist Paradox,” which postulates that on nice and sunny SF days when it seems as though it would be perfect to hang out at Zeitgeist, in actuality you don’t want to go anywhere near Zeitgeist because it’s packed to hell in there.

Zeitgeist Paradox Null-Hypothesis

And of course, if the city has their way, you won’t have to worry about smoke wafting up from the courtyard anymore either!  Burger fumes are another story, but only Vegansaurus would have a problem with that.  I also want to put on record that I really really wish my email address was timeghost11.  Totally fucked that one up.

Oh, and are you wondering how I shot all these pictures in the Zeitgeist courtyard without getting tossed?

(more…)

Reader Jesse W. had his bike stolen. Anyone seen it? It’s a really unique Schwinn cruiser that seems pretty hard to miss:

Last night (Thursday, 2/4), my super-fly Schwinn cruiser was stolen, along with three other bikes, from my garage at 15th and Guerrero.  It’s super recognizable, especially if the dumb-ass punk(s) who stole it neglect to unstring the LED christmas lights from the frame.

If you have any leads post a comment or email us (missionmissionmission at gmail dot com) and we’ll make sure Jesse hears about it.

Before the inevitable, “WTF dude, are you gonna post every stolen bike on here? People get their bikes stolen every day! Try Craigslist and next time triple-lock your bike to the radiator in your bedroom.” No, we don’t post every stolen bike on here, but we do post the ones from readers in the Mission who ask us nicely and we have been able to help recover stolen things before. So if you can spare the 2 seconds out of your busy weekend schedule to glance at this bike, then cool. If not, then no big deal.

Pizza Zone (‘N’ Grill!) on Duboce and Valencia.

Look, I’m not going to pretend I know anything about street art. The closest I got to “tagging” was repeatedly drawing the Stüssy S all over my binder in 7th grade.

But I think it’s really tacky when businesses paint their signs in graffiti text. It reminds me of those arcade machines in the 90′s that would show you a tag-font “Stay In School” splash screen when they started up. Even then I was cynical enough to see through their ridiculous attempt to appeal to my “urban” side.

This high-riding cyclist, spotted outside Four Barrel, was able to generate admiration from members of both the cycling and motorbiking communities, groups who often find themselves at odds with one another (usually over disputes involving the bike lane).  While I tend to support anything that can elicit agreement between such diverse citizenry, and I applaud this guy for apparently commuting to work on such “cool shit,” I’ve got to wonder:

How is he going to get off of this thing?  Does he need someone at his destination to hold the bike while he dismounts?  Does he just pedal up to a parked car and step off onto the hood?  Does he have to trackstand at every intersection since he can’t put his foot down?

These are questions that need to be answered!

<photo courtesy of Bikes and the City>

Already donated to Haiti relief and have an itching some more philanthropy? Laurie sent us a note about some neighbors organizing a community clean-up of 24th St on Monday morning. That should bring your smugness to an all-time high!

Start 2010 with a benevolent gesture and Join your neighbors in acknowledgement of A Day of Service on Dr Martin Luther King Junior’s day.

Bring your garbage bags, a caring attitude and an interest to improve your neighborhood.

There will be two 2-hour work periods starting at 10:00 am and 12 noon: choose from either one. It is proposed that folks work in groups of 4 or less. Meet at Phils Coffee on 24th street and Folsom at either 10:00 am or 12 noon to establish/join a group.

The intention is to collect street garbage within one city block around 24th street. Alternatively there is an interest to do some weeding along Harrison street sidewalk from 22nd to 24th.

Bring large garbage bags, brooms, dustpans and gloves. If you intend to weed bring your gardening tools.Collect garbage and/or weeds in your bags and dispose of the full bags in the trash cans at the street corners. If you have any questions email Elena at elena.engel@friendssfpl.org

Looking forward to working with other concerned citizens!!!!

Oh, and watch out for sinkholes.

This shit is off the hook!  Not only does this group look absolutely elated to be alive, we have a Walter Sobchak lookalike!  Solid.

(Oh, if this is your camera, you can holler to get it back)

I always thought The Knockout was a place where people who still think Nirvana is indie went to score blow.  Turns out people dance there too!  I had been seeing these pictures pop up on flickr a lot and kept thinking “what brand of douchebag goes to a club that, presumably, hires some jackass to take photos of their trashed customers, watermarks/brands/copyrights the photo, and upload them to flickr?”  So I decided to do a little recon/spectating with the ultimate authority of Mission douchebags last night.  Dunno about it.  Felt like a more over-hyped promoted/less fun version of emo night at Pops (which is free and they serve $1 high life).  The whole time I was there nothing really notable or exciting happened.  Some drunk chicks hit the photobooth but the whole thing was mostly shouting at your friends over the DJ.  Rolled out at midnight, went to Farolito, savaged a burrito, and went to bed.

Of course, some of my friends stuck around.  Got this text this morning:

“Forgot to tell you about the girl who was peeing in the urinal as I was puking in the stall.  Told me not to turn around because she was embarrassed.”

Chris, did you get any snaps of that?