Our pal Lauren found out the hard way:
Forgetting where I was, I mindlessly ordered a “double mocha” at Philz because it felt like November today. The barista scoffed, looked me up and down and said, “Ashley. Sweetie. You’ve never been here before, have you?” And then everyone behind the counter laughed at me.
And then a bucket of pig’s blood fell on my head.
And that’s why you shouldn’t drink coffee.
[Photo by Hae Eun]
Honestly, people should just go to Starbucks to order their Starbucks drinks. The line is already long enough without having to wait behind dome dipshit who needs to have the concept of what a real macchiato is explained to them (and whether or not Phil’z will make one for them).
Honestly, why don’t you fuck off! “The line is already long enough”". Quit whining like a little girl. What a silly bitch you are:-)
Honestly, shut the fuck up with your coffee hipsterisms. Coffee places are already shitty enough without you having to laud your amazing coffee “knowledge” over everyone.
Thank you, Bobwhobuilds. Pretentious idiots are ruining the City as much as any corporate whores are. It’s just a drink. Get over yourselves. Okay, thanks!
so much anger, all around here….sheesh, it’s “summer” people, lighten up!
I’d do anything I could to make myself feel better if I was a coffee “expert” making 9 bucks an hour to pay the bills, so that I could make art that no one will ever buy. I’d take their insults as a compliment.
+1
Yeeup
More like macchiahole.
My response would be “Nope! And based on this interaction, I won’t be back again!” You can still take people’s money without being a dick about it.
Why have those kinds of drinks on the menu if you wont make them?
Philz is awful.
Except those kind of drinks are not on the menu…
I went into Phil’s once, not knowing they don’t serve espresso. When I ordered an espresso drink, the staff was rude and condescending. They could have just told me they don’t have espresso, but no, that was too straightforward. They wasted everyone’s time being dicks to me. Obviously I haven’t been back.
I’ve made that same mistake
Because its too hard to read their menu and see what they offer? Dont blame others for your lack of effort, or illiteracy. Either way your loss, their coffee is the bomb.
Except they DO serve espresso. That was my drink for the longest time. They pour espresso over the espresso. The shit is crack. And each and every time the barista asked: “You HAVE had this before, right?!?”
Phil told me once to only drink a little bit of it, then keep it on my counter overnight.
Nah, it’s funnier to try ordering a Frappuccino at Four Barrel.
I just ask for a cup of hot water for my bag of Lady Grey.
So obnoxious. IT’S FUCKING COFFEE, PEOPLE; NOT A DIAMOND TIARA.
Philz is the best coffee. They don’t serve espresso. Imagine going into Four Barrel and ordering a smoothy.
The smoothies at four barrels are awesome!
I strongly recommend the Burna Vista Blast.
Oh oh, is this one of these places where an order for a large cup of black coffee requires one to play 20-questions?
I have a sense that this is one of those french press places where a cup of coffee requires one to make many choices about beans and the like. Is it?
Philz doesn’t have double mochas or espressos. They make your coffee or tea handmade right in front of you. Isn’t that enough? You choose what beans you want and everything, it’s actually a specialty coffee shop and not really a cafe per se where they make your basic coffee type drinks, like macchiatos, mochas, esperessos, etc. There’s no point in being assholes about them being assholes about it. But yeah, no one likes being condescended to so I get people’s ire about it.
Since the first time I went to Philz with a “Z”, I’ve had a difficult time on public transportation trying to decipher whether I smell fart, or really REALLY good coffee.
Violence would solve this issue.
Cool, let’s use your face as an outlet, shall we?
I totally feel for Lauren. If baristas understood that, first and foremost, they act as our drug dealers, this wouldn’t be such a problem.
Ha! The amount of attitude I get from my drug dealer is way worse.
That sort of attitude is exactly the reason I don’t go to Philz. *shrug*
(well, that and the fact that the whole “one-cup-at-a-time” fad is total bullshit)
Philz makes their own version of a mocha and other flavored coffe drinks, why didnt she just recommended one of those and explain their whole schpeil. Unnesccesary bitchassnes.
Let’s face it: mochas are for soccer moms and high schoolers. Also, it’s not that hard to read a menu.
+1
Some questions: The mocha orderer’s name is given as Lauren. Yet, the barista addressed her as “Ashley. Sweetie.” Now, I suspect the “sweetie” part is hyperbole. But what about the “Ashley” part? Is calling someone “Ashley” a new way to condescend to girls who seem fake, vapid, and Barbie-doll like?
Is “Ashley. Sweetie,” a catch phrase in some movie I don’t know about? Or is Lauren using poetic license to make us know how she really felt?
Phuck Philz
So now this blog is press releases from approved restaurants and negative yelp reviews for the rest?
Similar experience. Went in for the first time a while back and like an apparently uneducated FOOL, ordered a cappuccino at the front. The barista’s response was a snide smile and a “Yeah, welcome to Philz.” Confused, I responded with “Hi” and got a “Ok, we do things a little different around here…”.
Looked to my friend and had her order me whatever she was getting. Pretty good but maaaan did that barista shame me.
I’ve also ordered a mocha here because sometimes i want some fucking chocolate in my coffee. No one ever gave me any shit about it either. whatever.