The Old Fashioned at Hog & Rocks (pictured above with a duck skewer) has long been my favorite Old Fashioned , so I’m intrigued bar manager Michael Lazar has added a whole new section to their cocktail menu called “Pimp My Old Fashioned.” (Obviously, they always do it the right way: no muddled fruit, no ginger ale, etc.) Here it is:
PIMP MY OLD FASHIONED
Bittered Sling (Eric Adkins) $16
Ch. briat hors d’age armagnac, gum syrup, bitters, grated nutmeg
Anticuado $16
Casa noble reposado, agave gum syrup, orange bitters
Oaxaca (Phil Ward) $16
Tres agaves reposado, del maguey ‘minero’ mezcal, agave gum
syrup, grapefruit bitters
Kingston $12
Appleton estate 12 yr rum, sugar cane syrup, chocolate &
orange bitters
The Willet 8 $ 15
H&R willet 8 yr barrel strength bourbon, gum syrup, orange
bitters
House Rock & Rye $11
Wild turkey and rittenhouse ryes, rock sugar, citrus, vanilla
bean, horehound
Smoker’s Delight (Gonçalo de Sousa Monteiro) $15
Laphroaig 10 yr single malt, tempus fugit creme de cacao, bitters
Can’t wait to have every single one! In one sitting! Like a pimp would!
Full cocktail menu here.
 has long been my favorite Old Fashioned , so I’m intrigued bar manager Michael Lazar has added a whole new section to their cocktail menu called “Pimp My Old Fashioned.” (Obviously, they always do it the right way: no muddled fruit, no ginger ale, […]</p>
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It couldn’t have been your favorite for *that* long… they’ve only been open for what, 2 years?
I like to live in the moment.
THE MOMENT THAT SUCKS.
Well, someone’s gotta comment on the prices:
Let’s charge at least $35 for such drinks and add $45 for valet parking–that’s just for stopping off for the drink. Then it’s off to Simpkin et Cie for a round of small plates–starting at $65 apiece. By the time 10 PM rolls around (on a Wed. night), you’re just getting started on your main meal.
[MissionMission reports on decadence. Hear ye, hear ye!] And have ye heard about micro-malt whiskey? It’s better than single malt–only grown on the southeast coast of a tiny island in the Shetlands called Laoghairiain. Less than 1/2 an acre of prime malt to produce the finest malt this side of well–Laoghairiain. Mixed with the finest Belgian chocolate it creates an excellent chocolate malted. Stir in a jigger of HTL Pluskers
Olde Plebiscite and you’ve got a real smooth play. I’ll let you on to a neighborhood haunt that will pour you one for 1/2 the going rate, as long as you ride your bike there.
DON’T YOU KNOW THAT IF YOU SAY STUFF LIKE THIS YOU’RE A TROLL BECAUSE ONLY TROLLS CARE ABOUT MONEY AND HOW THIS NEIGHBORHOOD IS NOW A HUGE PILE OF BULLSHIT WITH A GOOGLE/FACEBOOK FLAG PLANTED ON TOP.
Don’t be mad some people have money. Maybe you should have studied harder. Now fuck off while I laugh at you.
This right here is exactly what’s up in the New Mission.
This is severely fucked up.
I was wondering why the newbies dress like the ‘dick’ from all those 80s movies. Now I know. That Steff McKee-Beckersted-Neidermeyer-Alpha Beta shit is tiresome.
DON’T BE MAD THAT SOME PEOPLE BENEFIT FROM A CLASS SYSTEM THAT BENEFITS THOSE BORN RICH. DON’T BE MAD THAT THE COUNTRY YOU LIVE IN STILL HOLDS DOWN MINORITIES. DON’T BE MAD THAT THE MISSION SUCKS NOW.
Waaaaaaaaaaaah. Cry more, crybaby.
YOU’RE DOING IT FOR ME
You are a bad person.
fuck you for stealing my trolling angle. gotdamnitt eric we talked about this.
Says the guy who works at Twitter 12 hours a day and on weekends.
The mission is better than ever!(ignore everything)
$45 for valet parking? I call that the “Willie Brown Tax.” Nobody else would use it.
There is one positive change that I didn’t anticipate. My skin has never looked better. I’m starting to think I might have been wrong about my acne. Could it be a simple wheat allergy? Or is there another variable at play here?
Anything with horehound in it has got to be amazing!
My recipe, a little simple syrup, a little orange bitters, a little Luxardo, a lot of Fee’s old fashioned bitters, 2 ozs of rye, ice.
The lazy way where it is just too much trouble, 2 ozs of Rye, Fee’s, ice.
I’ll be that dude: an Appleton cocktail priced at $12. HAHAHAHAHA! They got you good. Hough & Rocks.
$16 for a cocktail!? Wow!
Jesus. Those prices are fucking absurd.
Back to 40s in the street, and fuck the 10 cent bag.
I hate cocktail menus. A real man knows his drink without a menu. Especially a menu that starts at $11 per and goes UP from there.
here here, 1 ingredient in a glass right (maybe ice)? pounds hairy chest
I can’t say if these prices are right or not (as far as value), but jesus you need to be making some good money to spend $16 on a cocktail.
im going to make myself an amazing cocktail with all the tears being shed in this post.
bitters infused.
So, what’s the tip on a $16 dollar cocktail? 2 dollars? 3? So that’s basically a yuppie food stamp ($20) per drink?
huh.
Shit just got real.
wackness
REAL MISSION NATIVES DON’T DRINK COCKTAILS. IF YOU FROM HERE THEN YOU KNOW YOU ONLY DRINK 4LOKKO OUT OF A MCDONALD’S CUP. SIDWALK SLAMMIN. SFGIANTS!!!1
I’ll never understand what compels bartenders in this city to fuck with the classics so much. Why not just throw a fucking Flaming Lamborghini on your menu and be done with it?
Regarding the price of the drinks: it’s not like you’re out slamming fucking 10 of these every night. One of these is the equivalent of like 3 or 4 shots of whatever kind of alcohol you drink. Basically the same as grabbing 4 shots of Jamo throughout the course of the night when you compare dollars to booze. Quit being a cheap fucker. And when you do man up get that drink, don’t talk to your fucking date about how you can tell the difference between Rye X and Rye Y. You can’t, and you know it. Just stop.
Disclaimer: I’ve been to Hog & Rocks and really enjoyed their cocktails, but god damn, if I see one more fucking made up cocktail for the sake of making up a cocktail I’m going to punch somebody in the dick. Maybe myself. That’s it, I’m done.
” One of these is the equivalent of like 3 or 4 shots of whatever kind of alcohol you drink”
Not true at all. Not even close. That would be a disaster. People would be falling out all over the place.
You’re right. Two-ish. Nevertheless, it’s not like you’re having to rent out your closet if you want to go out and have a couple/few of these.
Nooooo–you already live in only a closet to afford these drinks.
I’m going to Shabooms!