Mission Mission

On the J!  Look alive, gumshoes!

(Thanks Christopher!)

Sexpigeon today published a devastating treatise on the donut in modern American society:

There have been efforts in our nation’s cities to better the donut. The concept of a donut is simple and unassailable, the manifestation of a donut is cheap to execute. How, then, to better a donut? So far the answer has been the same answer pizza and coffee were given back in the 1990s: get goofy with the flavors.

So now we’ve got hibiscus donuts, pb&j donuts, passionfruit donuts, carrot cake donuts, blood orange donuts with candied blood orange slices on top. These retail for two to four times the cost of an ordinary donut. You don’t mind paying this because the product is so very novel. You can tell your mom that in [American city x] they sell donuts that taste like Earl Grey tea, and she will be delighted in the mode of “what’ll they think of next,” and you can congratulate yourself for being a well-informed man-about-town. Rather large rewards for what amounts to an extra dollar or three.

Read on for the author’s take on how to better appreciate donuts worth appreciating.

Our buddy Kati J. spotted this on the ground somewhere in the vicinity of Mission Cliffs the other day — and for some reason DIDN’T PICK IT UP. For shame, Kati.

I hope somebody snagged it, and will soon bless us with some dope screencaps.

UPDATE: Kati J. defends herself:

Well, I thought it might be more beneficial to a tourist.

How thoughtful! You’re the best, Kati!

[via Melinda]

Mission Local reports:

A 22-year-old woman was kidnapped Sunday evening at 18th and Lexington streets and then fought off a rape attempt, escaped and called police, according to the SFPD.

Police Officer Abie Esparza said they learned of the crime from the San Mateo county hospital where the victim was treated.

The woman told officials that she was kidnapped Sunday at 5 p.m. by two men armed with knives.

They forced her into a green Toyota truck and headed south on Highway 101 driving over the county line into San Mateo.

Dang. Read on.

Photo of !!! by Marcus Laws

We Built This City reports:

April 18 - !!! at the Independent
April 19 – The Pains of Being Pure at Heart at the Great American Music Hall
April 20 – The Go! Team at Mezzanine
April 23 – Erin Brazill and the Brazillionaires’ Christmas in April show at 50 Mason
April 24 – Two Gallants at the Bottom of the Hill
April 25 – Paul Simon at Davies Symphony Hall
April 26 – Paul Simon at the Fox Theater
April 28 – Devil Makes Three at Slim’s
April 28 – The Oh Sees at Cafe du Nord
April 29 – Mike Watt at the Bottom of the Hill
April 29-30 – TV on the Radio at the Independent

May 3 – Battles at the Bottom of the Hill
May 4 – J Mascis at the Independent
May 5 – Fleet Foxes at the Fox Theater
May 7 – The English Beat at Bimbo’s
May 7 – Corin Tucker at the Bottom of the Hill
May 8-9 – Elvis Costello at the Fox Theater
May 10 – The Raveonettes at Bimbo’s
May 11 – The Kills at the Fillmore
May 11 – Pinback at Bimbo’s
May 13 – Of Montreal at the Fillmore
May 13 – Peter, Bjorn & John at the Great American Music Hall
May 13 – The Cars at the Fox Theater
May 13 – The Black Angels at Slim’s
May 14 – Man Man at Bimbo’s
May 14 – The Greenhornes at the Bottom of the Hill
May 16-17 – The Melvins at the Great American Music Hall
May 17 – Buffalo Tom at Slim’s
May 18 – The Fiery Furnaces at Cafe du Nord
May 19 – Echo & The Bunnymen at the Warfield
May 19 – The Knitters at the Great American Music Hall
May 20 – A Frames at the Bottom of the Hill
May 24 – Twilight Singers at the Fillmore
May 25 – Stiff Little Fingers (REALLY??) at Slim’s
May 25 – Joan as Policewoman at Cafe du Nord
May 25-26 – Yeasayer at the Fillmore
May 26-27 – Noah and the Whale at the Independent
May 30-31 – Sleigh Bells at the Independent
May 31 – Antlers at the Great American Music Hall

June 1 – Iron & Wine at the Warfield
June 2 – The Botticellis w/Breathe Owl Breathe at the Bottom of the Hill
June 3 – Architecture in Helsinki at Slim’s
June 4 – Adele at the Greek Theatre
June 5 – Anna Calvi at Cafe du Nord
June 6 – David Lowery at Cafe du Nord
June 7 – Sloan at Cafe du Nord
June 9 – Death Cab for Cutie at the Fillmore
June 13 – Florence & the Machine at the Greek Theatre
June 15 – X at the Great American Music Hall
June 17 – John Vanderslice and the Magik Magik Orchestra at the Herbst Theater
June 18 – Matt & Kim with the Thermals at the Fox Theater
June 13 – Bill Callahan at the Independent
June 22 – Okkervil River at the Fox Theater
June 24 – My Morning Jacket at the Fox Theater
June 28 – Sondre Lerche at the Great American Music Hall
June 28-29 – Dr. Dog at the Independent
June 29 – American Steel at the Bottom of the Hill
June 29 – Dropkick Murphys at the Warfield
June 30 – Blonde Redhead at the Independent

July 13 – David Bazan at the Independent
July 19 – Owl City at the Warfield
July 19-20 – The Avett Brothers at the Fox Theater

Aug. 16 – The Go-Go’s at the Fillmore
Aug. 23 – Crowded House at the Warfield

What a lineup! I’m glad I didn’t bother going to Coachella. The San Francisco music scene rules!

Maybe pyramids are hecka hard to render or something?

Anyway, Ticklefight is pretty upset about all this.

[Photo by Abby]

[Photo by Mills Baker]

More congrats to Johnny0 (aka Burrito Justice), who single-handedly named a neighborhood using only his imagination and a series of tubes. This takes some serious chops. I should know, as I was totally unsuccessful in my attempts to coin “Civic Valley“.

In the latest installment of this saga, the SF Examiner took an interest in this story and wrote it up. They declare:

So welcome to La Lengua, the Mission district-Bernal Heights microhood that needed a name. Yes, that’s right, it’s Spanish for “the Tongue,” a reference to the district’s shape, its preponderance of eateries serving tongue meat and the active imagination of the dude behind the Burrito Justice blog.

Perhaps most chilling, to me at least, was the closing line:

“I wouldn’t say it’s a hipster thing,” Johnny0 said. “I think it’s what happens when hipsters grow up and have kids … they come and live in La Lengua.”

The first time I met Johnny0, I invited him to brunch the next day. He said he was busy doing dad stuff. Then he said sorta waved his fingers in front of me and said in a spooky voice, “I am your fuuuuuture!”

This has haunted me ever since.

[via the Examiner]