Mission Mission

From Missed Connections:

Phat Phillys Girl – You work there – m4w (mission district)

And you are one of the fucking hottest things I have ever laid eyes on…and you like the Giants! We should hang out!

So romantic! And what luck that she likes the Giants!

If you’re interested, Hot Phat Phillys Girl, click here to get in touch.

[Photo by Jennifer Yin]

As one of the most revered coffee shops (gauged by Craigslist Missed Connections per week) in the Mission, Philz is always on the lookout for ways to increase the number of ways to serve you, the customer.  We’ve seen cupcakes, donuts, and empanadas; but we haven’t truly gotten a sense of the cafe’s plans for 24th Street domination until now, thanks to secret documents recently unearthed by local rabble-rouser brainslip:

El Philzolito
Burritos, tacos, etc. Chipz $0.50.

Philzeist
Porta-Potty packed smokey watering hole.

Philzamunde
Palestinian take on upscale sausage.

Phjlz Belgian Phrjtz
Benelux cone-based appetizers.

Read on for the rest.

[Photo by Premshree Pillai]

Previously:

Deal of the Year: $200 Annual Bottomless Miller Pint at Clooney’s

“Stay with me baby,” he begs.

I bet you want to know want to know what’s going on here. After the jump there might be an answer — or there might just be more confusion: (more…)

I bet you want to know how to make a handsome throw pillow out of a bunch of Pabst Blue Ribbon tall-can can coozies. Let SallyTV show you how.

Previously:

Pabst Cycling Cap

Sexpigeon just published this evidence of some kind of rad CBS sitcom from the late ’70s. IMDb doesn’t seem to know much about it. Wikipedia neither. What gives? A failed pilot? Something about it CBS is trying to keep hid?

Previously:

Necessary Conversation

Hot Faces has encountered a number of new hot faces in recent days. See anything you like?

Previously:

Hot Faces

Aw, hell naw:

The highlight of the night was pouring out beers for drinking in public, but that’s OK because these bad guys respected us for doing it, they knew this was breaking the law.

The question is, what kind of beers? Hopefully no local microbrews.

All this comes from their latest patrol report. The report also indicates that they accosted and handcuffed a kid for MUNI fare evasion. Apparently, it’s ok to slap handcuffs on a total stranger. If I wasn’t such a pussy, I might be inclined to say something slightly unflattering about these guys.

[via San Francisco Citizen]

Update: Our pal Joshua comments:

actually it looks like they handcuffed one of their own incognito. Then again, their writing is so god-awful I can’t really tell what they’re trying to say.

Previously:

Guardian Angels Patrol Walgreens, Call Vic Wong a Pussy

The waterfront was a shitshow obviously, but it was kind of fun flying in formation past miles of bumper-to-bumper traffic as the Blue Angels flew around in formation overhead. Plus, it seems they close Columbus to automobile traffic from Washington Square to Broadway, which was fun.

See you next year!

P.S. Look at that handsome Mission Workshop messenger bag on the lead rider up there.

Photo by Summer Is Rad.

Previously:

The Next KKKatie

‘Free KKKatie’ Graffiti in Europe