Mission Mission

This really only works if everybody follows the rules. If the guy before you didn’t, then there is surely all the more reason not to sit down. So, I’m sure this might work in Japan, where this blog oki yo is broadcasting from, but not nowheres else. Link.

Plus, if you’re really really drunk, once your pants are down and you’re seated, how easy is it going to be to get back up?

Previously:

Please Sit Down If You Are in Gwar

Special Tiolet Flushing Instructions

I mean, I avoid “the bro” every chance I get. But to straight-up bar them from the community? That seems a tad bit like overkill.

Photo by Hamburger Eyes.

Previously:

Bros Vs. Buddhists

This is old news to a lot of you, but the Bike Kitchen rules.

My Peugeot had an unfortunate run-in with a BMW some time ago and I’ve been needing to replace the front fork. Local shops were estimating a >$125 repair and some even refused to do the work due to liability. Eventually, I said “screw that, the bike isn’t even worth that much” and took it in to the Bike Kitchen Saturday to work on it myself.

An old-timer volunteer, Rudy, patiently showed me how to use all the headset installation tools, bitched about how he didn’t have such extravagancies in his day (“We just did this with a hammer and screwdriver!”), and even offered some MacGuyver workarounds that any reputable shop wouldn’t touch with a ten-foot seat post (coke can stem shimming! using old headset parts as spacers!). I stuck around a bit longer to true my wheels and adjust my brakes and I was back on the road in a couple of hours.

Yeah so maybe I’ll be scraping myself off the grill of a bus in a couple of weeks but it’s my life, dammit, and it only cost me $5 to use their space, extensive set of tools, and replacement parts for the day.

The Bike Kitchen is right here in the Mission on Florida between 18th and 19th. Open hours are: Tue, Wed, Thu 6-9pm; Sat noon-5pm

Previously:

Rainy Day Bike Kitchen Caravan

I’m still trying to figure out what a “fixed-speed” bicycle is, but this product review (written by a San Franciscan, of course) seems to clear things up:

Next thing you know, somebody’ll try to ban tiny hoodies in the Mission.

Thanks, Amanda!

Previously:

American Apparel NSFW Hoodie Ad

American Apparel’s Hooded Swimsuit

Reader Andy B. just sent in this evidence of the latest trend to hit the neighborhood.

Don’t know what took us so long though — sidewalk sunbathing has been the pastime of choice elsewhere in town for hella seasons already.

Or maybe she’s just gearing up early for the Dolores Park closure.

Armand from Mission Local seems to be on assignment on the Indian subcontinent somewheres, and he’s got this gem of a photograph (and a boatload more) to prove it.

Dr. Sameer, we salute you (and your facial hair).

Armand, keep up the good work (and say hi to your facial hair for us).

P.S. I’ve heard of some bullshit degrees in my time, but at least nobody else is actually calling it a B.U.M.S., amirite?

Previously:

Becca in India: Single-Speed Bike Loom

Misguided 90′s angst lives on in the Dolores Park Men’s bathroom.

Previously:

Dolores Park To Close

Save Dolores Park! With Internet Rage!

He’s back already, wizard staff and all. On top of that, here he is peacefully talking shop with a competitor, the special-brownie hippie lady (SBHL). All is well in the world again. Dogs and cats, living together, mass hysteria.

Previously:

The End Of An Era In Dolores Park

San Francisco newcomer Alexia Tsotsis observes that there’s nothing so incongruous as a hipster at a Costco. SF rules!! Link.