Mission Mission

Each patron refused to acknowledge the scene in the middle of the room, trying to forget it ever happened, trying to pretend everything would be okay as the piano player solemnly maintained his fugue.  What was going on here, Revolution Cafe?

My friends would seriously like to know.

Frjtz is exploring the possibilities of the new Valencia Street and all its extra space. I’ve never eaten there, and the menu, prices and ambiance don’t entice me. But actually sitting down outside without the fear of Gavin Newsom popping out from behind a safety cone and forcing me onto a one way bus trip to Santa Cruz, that sounds pretty nice. What do you think?

Construction. That’s what’s up.

First it was just a blindfolded Barbie™ top on the roof of a car. Then it got complicated.

I was walking down 17th Street and stopped when I recognized a familiar landmark. I noticed a pigeon standing on the roof, eyeing the torso with sideways glances. I was thinking about what the next level of this situation could look like when a man came out of Maverick and started speaking to me.

“Are you the owner of this car?”
“No.”
“Oh. Well, we’ve been trying to figure out how to get this pigeon to skull fuck the Barbie™ for a while.”

Then he put a piece of bread on her head and we both watched and waited.

I suggested a trail, which he was already on top of. As he made the little bread path the bird got embarrassed and uncomfortable and flew away.

End of situation.

Mission and Highland, as requested, has just followed up on yesterday’s trash-tipping tale. It takes a crane, ladies and gentlemen, to hoist a tipped San Francisco trashcan out of the gutter. It takes a crane.

Kudos to the City of SF for a job well done in a timely fashion.

They might be bringing water grenades!

Previously:

Abandoned Super Soaker

Could this be the art for Weezer’s mellower followup to Raditude or what?

More importantly, this is my second animal post of the day. What is wrong with me?

Photo by nuzz.

Reader James read the story about an undercover police officer allegedly saying, “Shut your fucking mouth bitch or I’ll knock you off your bike,” to a female cyclist, and responded thusly:

wow. just another reason to always carry a gun when you ride.

(link)

What, like G Baby here? It’s cute for a second, and then it’s like WESTERN CIVILIZATION IS CRUMBLING THE HORRORRRRRR!!

We hope James is joking, but wouldn’t be surprised if he is not. So fess up, anonymously or otherwise: Who’s packing heat in the bike lane?

Photo by Willicious Images.

Has anyone ever done this? What does it take, an automobile? A tractor? Or could a couple of neighborhood muscleheads get ‘er done if bored enough?

And does the city have to dispatch a backhoe to steady ‘er up again? Hopefully Mission and Highland (publisher of this here photo) will follow up toot sweet.

Previously:

Mailbox Tipping

Original Trash Tipping

In the comments section of our post about Dolores Park flunking playground school, reader Laurie says:

To be fair, A-grade Mission Playground, an excellent place that we adore, can be rough around the edges. In the last week there’s been parents picking up broken glass from the asphalt walkway within the fenced-in children’s playground. And within the fenced-in Valencia Street hardscape, small kids played with broken bottles, watching them shatter to smithereens.

(link)

So, kids will be kids? Colorful neighborhoods will be colorful neighborhoods?

Infographic by Mission Local.

Anybody need a rad tattoo such as this? Perhaps artist Jen Oaks can help you out.

Previously:

What Do You Wear When You Take Out The Recycling?